How doing nothing allowed me to grow

In January of this year, I left my corporate software engineering position to do nothing, and it was one of the best decisions I have made.

Before I get into the “why”, I’d like to point out that I am in a fortunate place to be able to leave my main source of income without lining up my next source. I was able to do this because I am young with few responsibilities, some savings, and on good terms with my parents, who happily welcomed me back home.

So why was leaving a job so pivotal for me? As you may have guessed from the title of this post, it allowed me to grow as a person. As with most Americans, I had been busy with something since I started Kindergarten. First it was school, then college, then work; all without a break or taking time just to figure out who I am and where I want to go in life. When I left my job, all of my thoughts, ideas, and fears became so much more apparent. I could witness my life in a way that I was mentally not able to in the past, and having this perspective is the first step in growing.

As an example, I improved my relationship with money when I cut off my income source. All my life I would save money because I had a fear of not having enough. When I cut off the source of money, I forced myself into an experience where money could not ease my fears. I learned to enjoy life for what it is. I let go of those fears, and learned that money is not important for living the way I want to live.

In order to see myself clearly, I had to stop everything else I was doing. I started to notice how I would react in certain situations, how I felt throughout the day, and what my mind would focus on. I could take time to explore these thoughts and feelings and empower myself to redefine my reality. I was raised in my parents’ and peers’ view of the world, but now that I have this awareness, I can change how I think that is best for me.

Having this level of self awareness is a skill that I could only learn by having nothing else on my plate, but it is absolutely a skill that I will keep with me for the rest of my life. As humans, we are always growing and learning; always doing our best. Knowing how you think is one of the best ways to improve and grow in life, and I am so grateful to have received this view into myself.